Circle of Friends Part 4 Read online

  She almost said no. She almost issued the invitation she sensed he would accept. But then what? Could she make love with Carter a second time and not get emotionally involved?

  What if the worst happened? What if she fell for him? He was the guy most likely to walk away, which would leave her emotionally broken and bleeding on the side of the road.

  “I can’t do this,” she told him.

  “I’m not asking you to.”

  “Right. You’re not.”

  She made the rational choice then and collected her car keys. Then she walked across the parking lot and into the relative safety of her small car.

  Once she’d started the engine, she drove directly home without once looking back. She knew if she looked back, she would turn around. And if she turned around, she might be lost forever.

  CHAPTER NINE

  RACHEL HANDED OVER her car keys and walked into the waiting room of the local auto repair shop. She was diligent about regular oil changes for her little car, although this might be one of the last ones she’d have to have done. The two-seater convertible wasn’t practical for a single mom with a newborn. She would have to start looking around for something bigger. Maybe a four-door of some kind. Something with a good safety record and side airbags.

  Maybe Carter could help her find one that was...

  She flopped down onto one of the plastic chairs and held in a groan. Not Carter. She hadn’t seen or talked to him since the fall festival the previous weekend and she preferred things that way. Better to take some time and get him off her mind and out of her system.

  She’d been doing a pretty good job, too, not thinking about him more than three or four hundred times a day. Now if she could get that down to an even hundred, she could consider herself on the road to recovery.

  The problem was she missed him. He was so good to have around. Not just because he was gorgeous—which he was—but because he was fun and charming and caring and thoughtful. And those qualities made her once again wonder why she was so dead set on avoiding anything personal with him.

  But every time she thought about talking to him about something more than their pretend relationship, she felt shaky and afraid. Nope, this was better.

  She opened a home decorating magazine, but couldn’t concentrate on any of the articles. Then she flipped through a travel magazine, but that didn’t hold her interest, either. She was the only customer and knew she wouldn’t be waiting long, but still she felt restless. Giving in the need to move, she walked out of the waiting room and paced the sidewalk of the main road.

  This was the part of town that catered to those with cars. There were several body shops, a place that sold custom wheels and a motorcycle sales-and-repair place. She stared at the latter because it made her think of Carter. That’s where he was working. Or at least pretend work while undercover.

  Pretend work, pretend relationship. Was anything in his life real?

  A beautiful blonde stepped out of the sales office and onto the sidewalk. Three men followed her. They were all talking intently. Then a fourth man joined them and Rachel nearly shrieked in surprise. It was Carter!

  She glanced around, not sure what she should do. Not call out to him, of course. That was his police world and she wasn’t supposed to know him.

  She turned and hurried to the waiting room. When she was safely back in the small, glass space, she hid behind a magazine, while watching the ongoing conversation. The men seemed to come to some kind of agreement, because they all shook hands. Then Carter put his arm around the blonde and gave her a long, lingering kiss on the lips.

  The magazine fell to the floor. Rachel half rose, then sank back onto the seat. She blinked several times, but the image didn’t go away. There was Carter sharing a very intimate moment with another woman.

  Her chest ached, it was difficult to breathe and she had the strongest urge to cry. Only this time the tears wouldn’t be brought on by pregnancy hormones. Instead they would be the result of anger and betrayal.

  How could he do that? How could he kiss someone else? They were...

  What? she thought. What were they doing? Not dating. Not for real. It was all fake, done for the benefit of his family. Hadn’t she made it clear that she didn’t want anything from him? Hadn’t she made it clear she wasn’t any more interested in getting involved than he was? So none of this should matter.

  Except it did and she hurt.

  “Hey, Rach, the car’s done. Oil’s changed and everything else checks out fine.”

  She turned toward her mechanic. “Thanks, Evan. What do I owe you?”

  Twenty minutes later she found herself driving around town. Her work day was finished, she was tired and confused and the best place for her was home. Only she couldn’t seem to make herself go in that direction, so she made turns until she pulled in to the parking lot of the Blue Dog Bar.

  She stared at the neon sign, then at the door. The need to go inside got stronger and stronger until she finally climbed out of her car and walked across the parking lot.

  It took her eyes a second to adjust from the bright afternoon to the dimness of the bar. She glanced around and saw Jenny drying glasses. Rachel wasn’t sure why she thought Carter’s ex-girlfriend could help. Maybe it was because Jenny knew the man but seemed to have let him go and moved on. Maybe it was because Carter’s sisters and mother liked and trusted her. Maybe it was the first symptom of a pregnancy-induced insanity. Regardless, Rachel made her way to the bar and slid onto a stool.

  Jenny put down her dishtowel. “Hi, Rachel. This is a surprise. Looking for Carter again?”

  “No. I have his cell number now.”

  Jenny grinned. “Good for you. So what’s up? You want something to drink?” Her gaze dipped to Rachel’s midsection. “A seltzer or soda?”

  “Just water, please.” She glanced around at the quiet room and remembered how busy it had been that first night, when she’d come here with Diane. “How long have you worked here?”

  “Mostly all my life,” Jenny said. “My dad owns the place. Or he used to. I’m buying him out, a little every month. Dan jokes that when we finally own the place outright, we’ll license the name and become a chain. I’m thinking one bar is plenty.” She handed Rachel a tall glass of water with ice and a slice of lemon. “Here you go.”

  “Thanks.” Rachel sipped the water. “I, ah, I’m not sure why I’m here. I didn’t know where else to go. You know Carter and you seem nice.”

  Jenny shook her head. “That doesn’t sound good. Is there a problem?”

  “I don’t know. Maybe. I was getting my oil changed and I went for a walk while I was waiting. I saw Carter across the street with a bunch of guys. There was a blonde there, too. Tall and really beautiful. He kissed her. Seriously kissed her. For a long time. I know what he does and I know this is probably some part of that, but still...”

  Jenny pulled up a stool and sat down. “Carter doesn’t cheat. He has a lot of flaws, but that’s not one of them. He doesn’t lie or even bend the truth. If you two are together and he was kissing someone else, then it was about work. Trust me. I’ve known him for a lot of years. Despite plenty of opportunity, he’s never once strayed.”

  If he were in a relationship, Rachel thought glumly. But they weren’t. Not really. So who was the woman?

  Jenny leaned toward her. “Look, I’m sorry about before. That I told his mom you were pregnant. I didn’t know you and I wanted to protect Carter. He’s important to me. Now, I kinda wish I’d kept my mouth shut.”

  Rachel smiled. “It worked out okay, but thanks for apologizing. I adore his family, but they’re a lot to deal with.”

  “I know. That’s what’s so great about him. Listen, Carter is terrific, but there will always be women in his life. His family, his old girlfriends, even me. He adores women and they adore him.”

  “I’ve met a few of the old girlfriends. Some of them are scary.”

  “I know.” Jenny smiled. “There were a couple who made it clear that they wanted him back and they didn’t care that we were together.”

  “I ran across one of those, too. They’re everywhere. He says he’s sworn off women before, but with so many exes strolling around, I don’t see how that’s possible.”

  “They were short breaks,” Jenny told her. “Sometimes measured in hours.”

  Rachel ran her finger down the length of the glass. “What happened with you two? Why did you break up?”

  “Honestly? I wanted him to fall madly in love with me and he never did. I don’t think Carter’s ever been in love. Not romantically. He thinks he’s immune, but I believe he’s going to fall hard one day and I can’t wait to see it. Maybe you’ll be the one.”

  Rachel had her doubts about that. “He’s had plenty of opportunity.”

  “If you’re going to be with him, you have to be able to handle what happened before. Those other women exist.”

  “So I’ve seen. Some of them can’t seem to let go. You did, though.”

  “I was pretty broken up when Carter and I split, but it worked out for the best. Dan is amazing. If I’d stayed with Carter, I never would have met him.”

  “But you’re still a part of Carter’s life. Isn’t that strange?”

  “It was at first,” Jenny admitted with a smile. “But after a while I realized I missed his family more than I missed him. Liz and I had become close. So I just butted in. No one minded, least of all Carter. Which is good. I’m the only child of a single dad. I never had brothers or sisters. Now I have both. The Brockett clan is good at taking in strays, and I
’m happy to be one of them.”

  Strays? Rachel had never thought of herself that way but she supposed she fit the description, which didn’t make her comfortable.

  “You should talk to Carter,” Jenny said. “Ask him about the kiss.”

  “But that would be so logical and mature. I don’t think I’m ready for that.”

  “It’s your call. Better to get the question answered than wonder.”

  “It’s not a big deal,” Rachel assured her. “We’re not...we’re not that serious.”

  “Really? For someone who isn’t serious, you seem plenty upset.”

  “I’m fine.”

  “Are you trying to convince me or yourself?”

  * * *

  CARTER THOUGHT ABOUT calling first, but he didn’t want to get into it on the phone with Rachel. So he swung by his mother’s house, picked up lasagna, garlic bread and salad, then showed up at Rachel’s place a little after five.

  “I hope you haven’t eaten yet,” he said when she opened the door.

  She wore her hair back in a ponytail and her face was scrubbed clean of makeup. He liked seeing the pale freckles on her nose and the tiny scar by her right eyebrow. She wore a T-shirt and old jeans, an intriguing contrast to her usually prissy teacher clothes. Not that he hadn’t learned to appreciate the subtle sexiness of prissy.

  “What?” she asked as she stepped back to let him in. “I haven’t eaten. I was going to have a salad or something. Why are you here with dinner? We didn’t have plans.”

  He carried dinner into her kitchen and set it on the counter. “I’ve had five phone calls in the past hour,” he told her. “Word travels fast.”

  She groaned. “Jenny called one of your sisters?”

  “Two of them, actually. They called the third and my mom.” He took her hands in his and rubbed her fingers. “I was working. Ellie is my partner. That’s all. We’re posing as a couple for this assignment. I would never cheat on you.”

  She made a halfhearted attempt to pull her hands free. When he didn’t let her, she sighed.

  “It’s fine. I understand. Plus, it’s not like we’re really dating.”

  For once he couldn’t tell what she was thinking. “Whatever we are, that can’t have been fun to see.”

  She shrugged. “I was shocked and then I wasn’t sure I had the right to be upset. Not that I was.”

  He tugged her a little closer and stared into her eyes. “I’m sorry you were upset. I really am doing this for work.”

  Her mouth twisted slightly. “Oh, sure. Talk about a yucky assignment. She’s beautiful.”

  “She’s okay. But I don’t think of her that way. She’s my partner. It’s about as exciting as kissing one of my sisters. Besides, even if I wanted to like it, I couldn’t. Her husband is a big guy and he’d beat the crap out of me.”

  That earned him a smile.

  “I’m okay,” she told him. “Thanks for worrying, but you don’t have to.”

  “Are you sure? Because I grew up with three sisters. I know how to dig up a good worry on command.”

  The smile widened. “Maybe next time.” She tilted her head. “Are you mad because I talked to Jenny?”

  “You’re allowed to talk to anyone you want.”

  “In theory. I wasn’t spying on you or trying to dig up secrets. Honestly, I just didn’t know what to think.”

  “Did she help you feel better?”

  “Sort of. We talked about your past.”

  Not good, he thought glumly. “You can’t hold that against me.”

  “I’m not. However, I think there should be some kind of club, or support group. We could come up with a name and hold meetings. You could be a guest speaker.”

  He released her hands. “You are upset.”

  “I’m really not. It’s just you’re not like any other guy I’ve ever known.”

  That didn’t sound pleasant. “It’s the volume thing,” he muttered, knowing he wasn’t going to apologize for dating a lot. Despite the gnawing in his gut, he hadn’t done anything wrong. “Look, when I’m with a woman, she’s the one I’m interested in. Not anyone else.”

  “I know that. You’re loyal and honest and from what I can tell, you don’t have any flaws.”

  “That’s what I’ve been saying for years,” he told her. “No one listens.”

  She smiled again. “Okay, you do have flaws, but they’re not typical ones.”

  “Which would be?”

  “I don’t know. An obsession about sports. An inability to show up on time.”

  “I’m prompt.”

  “Yes, you are.” She shook her head. “I don’t even know what we’re talking about anymore.”

  “We’re talking about the fact that I’m sorry you were upset before. I should have told you about Ellie.”

  “It wasn’t your fault. It was just...weird.”

  “Recoverable weird?” he asked.

  Her green eyes sparkled with amusement and pleasure. “Yes. Recoverable weird.”

  He gave an exaggerated exhale. “Good, because the other kind of weird is just not for me.”

  “You’re a little crazy,” she said.

  “Also a good thing. See—I have so many good qualities. I’m prompt and charming and totally into the person I’m with.”

  “So if this was real, you’d be totally into me?”

  Awareness filled the room. Carter had a three-second battle with himself and need won over noble sacrifice. “I’m already totally into you.”

  Her eyes widened but she didn’t look away. “You don’t have to be. We’re just trying to fake out your family.”

  He moved closer. “Is that all? So nothing else is required?”

  “Not a thing.” This time she eased toward him.

  “So anything not related to faking out my family would be a waste of time and energy?” he asked as he put one hand on her shoulder and touched her cheek with the other.

  “Totally.”

  “Something I can relate to.”

  He kissed her. Rachel had known he was going to. In fact, she’d counted on it. Maybe it was a complete waste of time and energy, but she couldn’t think of a better way to do it.

  Her body clenched in anticipation of the pleasure she always experienced when he put his mouth on hers. She wrapped her arms around him and leaned against his hard, muscled body. Her breath caught, her lips parted and she prepared herself for the ride.

  He claimed her with a kiss that touched her down to her itty-bitty red blood cells. Heat poured through her making her tremble and want to rip off clothes. Desire exploded until she wondered if a kiss was going to be enough. If this time she would need more.

  He plunged his tongue into her mouth. She met him stroke for stroke, savoring the tingles that accompanied every brush, every inch of contact.

  Apparently he felt the pressing need, too, because he dropped his hands to her hips and urged her closer. She pulsed against him. The second she did so, she felt the hardness of his arousal. Her body remembered what it had been like to be claimed by him and she trembled.

  He kept his hands on her hips, holding her in place, then rubbed against her. She desperately wanted to wrap her legs around him so he could do exactly that to her hot, swollen center.

  He kissed his way along her jaw to her neck, and then down her neck. “We have dinner,” he whispered against her skin. Quick flicks of his tongue followed by little bites punctuated his sentence. “Lasagna.”

  “I love lasagna,” she moaned.

  “So we could stop and eat.”

  Stop? Was he kidding? She slid her hands under his loose T-shirt and rested her palms on his bare belly. “Do you really want to stop?”

  He raised his head and grinned. “I think the pasta will keep.”

  “Me, too.”

  That decided, she expected him to pull her into his arms again. Instead, he grabbed her hand and led her down the hallway. When they were in her bedroom, he sat on the bed and pulled off his boots. After he’d let them fall on the floor, he tugged her between his legs and unfastened the button at the waistband of her jeans.