Living on the Edge Read online

  She laughed. “You think?”

  “Absolutely.”

  It seemed like a good idea. She pulled off her long-sleeved T-shirt, then unfastened her jeans. Her bra went next, then her panties. When she was naked, she started to ask him what he thought, but before she could form the words, he drew her into his arms, then tumbled them both onto the bed.

  They fell in a tangle of arms and legs, with him taking most of the weight. Before she could figure out if she was squishing him or not, he was kissing her and his hands were everywhere.

  He touched her breasts with his fingers, teasing her nipples until she had to cry out with pleasure. He claimed her mouth, even as his fingers strolled down her belly to the waiting damp curls below.

  She touched him in return, exploring his back, his chest and his arms. She kissed him with a passion she wasn’t sure she’d ever felt before. Need claimed her until she felt herself pulsing with longing.

  When he slipped his hand between her thighs, she sighed in gratitude. He explored her, gently discovering her secrets. Even as his thumb circled that sensitive bundle of nerves, he slipped a finger inside of her, mimicking the act of love to follow.

  The steady rhythm of his touch claimed her attention. Every nerve went on alert, every muscle tensed. When he shifted so he could lean over her chest and take a nipple in his mouth, she stopped breathing. It was too much.

  The nearly two years without a man combined with the skill of the man pleasing her and her own affection for him. In a matter of seconds, she couldn’t hold back. Her orgasm claimed her in a shuddering release that made her cry out, even as she felt her muscles contracting over and over again.

  At last she was still. Tanner moved to her side and held her close. He stroked her hair and kissed her face while she tried to recover.

  “That was quick,” she said after she’d caught her breath.

  “You were in some pretty serious need.”

  “Apparently so. It’s funny because I never would have thought that before. I guess I denied the physical part of my existence because it was easier than dealing with it.”

  He brushed his mouth over hers. “And now?”

  She smiled. “Ready for round two.”

  “Fair enough.”

  He pushed himself up onto his knees, then shifted so he was between her legs. She expected him to put on a condom then enter her, but instead he bent down and lightly licked her nipples. First one, then the other. A brief, sensuous caress. It made her toes curl.

  “What are you doing?” she asked.

  “Round two.”

  “Okay. How many rounds are there?”

  “As many as you want.”

  With that, he lowered his mouth to her breast and gently sucked. The exquisite sensation of his swirling tongue, the feel of his lips, the heat and moisture had her grabbing the bedspread and hanging on for the ride.

  He moved between her breasts until she felt aroused and restless again. She wanted more. Fortunately he read her mind and began the slow journey down her belly. Kiss by kiss he moved to the promised land, where he claimed her with his mouth.

  It made what he’d done with her breasts look like an amateur act. He explored all of her with his tongue, then settled on that one spot and danced with it until she wanted to scream.

  She drew back her legs and dug her heels into the mattress. She pushed and writhed and panted and begged. Need filled her, yet she didn’t want to find her release. Not yet. It was too good, and if she came, he would stop.

  He licked and sucked and circled and nibbled until she knew she couldn’t hold back any longer. When he slowly inserted a finger inside of her, she lost control and surrendered to the pleasure. Wave after wave swept through her. She knew she screamed and she might have even blacked out for a second. God love a man into the details.

  This time when he tried to move next to her, she held him in place between her legs. He was still hard and obviously ready.

  “Round three,” she said, pulling open the nightstand drawer. “I assume you’re prepared.”

  Instead of answering, he reached inside and drew out a box of condoms. “Is this what you were looking for?”

  “Uh-huh.” With what had already happened, she was eager to have him inside. She wanted to give back a little of what he’d given her.

  He slipped on the protection, then slowly began to fill her. Her body stretched to accommodate him. She ran her fingers up and down his back as he reached the end then began to withdraw.

  The slow, steady rhythm of his movements had her tensing in anticipation. Need sparked, then grew. Despite the intimacy of the situation, she couldn’t help smiling.

  “What?” he asked.

  “I think it’s going to happen again. You’re going to think I’m insatiable.”

  He bent down and kissed her. “I’m going to think you’re amazing.”

  “Oh. I like that.”

  He stared into her eyes, keeping nothing from her. She saw the wanting there and the pleasure as he began to move faster and faster. She felt his body tense as he claimed her over and over. Her own senses filled with his heat, his scent, his need. They strained toward each other, clinging, thrusting, pulsing until she lost herself in the wonder of it all and he pushed one last time, only to still and call out her name.

  Chapter 14

  Tanner lay under the covers, Madison curled up at his side. He had one arm around her, holding her close. With his free hand, he stroked her face.

  “So beautiful,” he said, staring into her eyes.

  She smiled. “I’m okay. Plus, you’re on the good side.”

  The side without the scar, he thought. He shifted her until she rolled onto her back and he could see the scar, then he rose on one elbow and looked down at her.

  “Still beautiful,” he told her.

  “Thanks.”

  “I’m telling the truth.”

  “Maybe. I don’t mind that this makes me different,” she said, touching the raised ridge of red skin.

  “Do you need it?” he asked.

  She stared at him. “Why would you ask me that?”

  “Because you could have easily had it reduced or eliminated by a skilled plastic surgeon and you chose not to. There has to be a reason.”

  She touched his mouth with her fingers. “If I tell you that, you’ll know all my secrets.”

  “Is that such a bad thing?”

  Her gaze locked with his. “No, it’s not. I trust you, Tanner.”

  Her words touched him in places he would have sworn were dead. “I’ll never betray that trust.”

  “I have to believe that.” She continued to trace his mouth with her fingertips. “I keep the scar to remind me not to be stupid.”

  “Christopher?” he asked, settling back next to her and pulling her close.

  She rested her head on his shoulder and her hand on his bare chest. “Partially him.”

  “You’ll never make that mistake again,” he told her. “You learned. You’re not the same person who married him.”

  “You don’t know that.”

  “Actually I do.”

  “Okay. Maybe.” She sighed. “When I met Christopher, I was everything you thought I was when you and I met. Rich, pampered, useless. I had access to as much money as I wanted, but I didn’t have to do anything for it. Life was one round of parties after another. I was popular, friendly because it was easy and pretty enough to get by. No one really expected anything from me, including myself. When I met him, he treated me like a person. As if I mattered, specifically. I didn’t feel interchangeable. Of course, it was all a lie.”

  “You figured it out. That’s worth something.”

  “It took him pushing me through a glass door to figure out that I shouldn’t trust him. Up until a year or so before then, I’d always taken the easy way out, I hadn’t required enough of myself. I realized I had to become a real person. So I started to work on myself. He didn’t like the changes and did his best to sabot
age me. And I let him. I guess I didn’t require enough of him, either.”

  She reached up and rubbed her scar. “I’ve earned this. It reminds me of where I’ve been and what I’ve learned along the way.”

  “Are you sure?” he asked.

  She dropped her hand back on his chest. “What do you mean? That I haven’t earned it?”

  “No, that maybe you don’t need the scar anymore to remember. That maybe you’ve learned the lesson and it’s become a part of who you are.”

  She wrinkled her nose. “You’d like me to get the scar fixed.”

  He leaned close and kissed her lips. “No. I’d like you to make sure you’re keeping it for yourself, not to prove something to Hilliard.”

  “You mean that I’m still defying him?”

  “Are you?”

  “Interesting point. I’ll have to think about it.” She snuggled closer. “Can we sleep now?”

  “You want to sleep with me?”

  “Sure. I—Oh.” She drew back and sat up. “Right. You’re probably not the type who likes a woman to spend the night. It’s okay. I’ll go sleep in my own bed.”

  Several thoughts occurred to him at once. First, that there was an edge of pain in her voice, and he’d reached the point where he would change the tide rather than hurt her again. Second, he didn’t want her to go and that scared the crap out of him.

  He wrapped his arm around her and gently lowered her back to the mattress. “I would like you to stay,” he said.

  She shook her head. “You’re just being polite.”

  “If that was the case, I would have said please.”

  “You know what I mean. You don’t have to do this. I’m perfectly fine on my own.”

  “What if I’m not?” he asked.

  She didn’t look convinced. “A big, bad guy like you? What could you be scared of?”

  “You’re be surprised.” He stroked her hair, then tucked it behind her ears. “I would really like you to sleep with me tonight.”

  Her gaze searched his face. As he was telling the truth, he didn’t worry about what she would see there.

  He knew getting too close was a bad idea. Madison didn’t need the complication of a man in her life right now, and he didn’t do relationships. Even if he was willing to change his rules for her, what was the point? Whatever she felt now with him was simply about the danger she’d experienced. He’d saved her and she was reacting to that. When all this was over and she returned to her normal life, she would wonder what she saw in him.

  But for now she wanted to be with him, and he was willing to accept the terms. Better for both of them if this was just temporary, he told himself. Safer.

  “Okay,” she said with a sigh. “I’ll stay.”

  “Great. I have to get up now.”

  “What?” She sat up, pulling the sheet with her, and glared at him with mock anger. “You’re leaving after I’ve said I’ll sleep with you?”

  “Only for a couple of minutes.” He leaned over and kissed her. “I have to set up the encryption program to start decoding Hilliard’s laptop. I’m sure the program he picked is pretty tough to break into, and we can’t waste any more time.”

  She raised her eyebrows. “Are you telling me that making love was a waste of time?”

  He growled. “Stop twisting my words. You know what I meant.”

  “Huh. I’m not sure I do. I think when you come back to bed, you’re going to have to convince me. It might take a while.”

  Anticipation heated his blood. “You’re on.”

  Madison woke a little after ten and wasn’t surprised to find herself alone. Even if she and Tanner hadn’t gotten to sleep until almost four in the morning, he wasn’t the type to stay in bed past dawn.

  “Big ol’ tough guy,” she said with a yawn as she got out of bed and prepared to start what was left of her day.

  As she showered, she stretched muscles that were mildly sore from the unaccustomed activity. Pain or not, she felt great. Whole, which was odd considering she’d never felt anything was missing.

  Tanner was an interesting man. Tender in bed, which she wouldn’t have expected, but still tough. He’d held her through the night. Every time she’d awakened, he’d been right there, his arms around her.

  She told herself it didn’t mean anything, that it couldn’t mean anything—they’d only known each other a few days. Yet in some ways she felt as if she’d known Tanner forever. She’d seen him at his best and his worst. He had his flaws, but he was also a good man and she knew in her heart he would die to protect her.

  Neither of them was going to die, she told herself as she stepped out of the shower. They were going to beat Christopher at his own game and win this. After that…

  As she dried off, she realized she didn’t know what would happen after her ex was in jail and she was free to leave. Obviously she had her job to return to, but then what? What about Tanner? Would he just walk away?

  The thought made her heart ache, so she pushed it away and quickly dressed.

  The smell of coffee led her to the kitchen. She passed Tanner hard at work on some strange-looking program she guessed was for encryption.

  “Good morning,” he said as she walked back with her mug. “I thought you’d sleep later.”

  “Isn’t this late enough?”

  “We were up late.”

  She thought about what they’d been doing and smiled. “Yes, we were.”

  He grinned. “You were great.”

  “So were you.”

  They stared at each other, still smiling foolishly, until he shooed her away.

  “Back to work,” he told her. “Stop distracting me.”

  “And how am I doing that?”

  “Just by standing there.”

  Oh, she liked the sound of that. “So if I walked up to you and started unbuttoning my jeans…”

  He shook his head. “You wouldn’t even have to go that far. Just walking in would do it.”

  “Good to know.” She gave a little wave of her fingers, then headed for her bedroom. While she wouldn’t mind a repeat of last night, she thought they could both use the work time. Tonight they could focus on play.

  Fifteen minutes later, she’d logged into her e-mail account and started working her way through letters from kids, along with a few notes from staff members. At the bottom of the list was an e-mail from Christopher.

  Madison stared at the listed address and felt her muscles tense. Even knowing he couldn’t find her, she felt unnerved by the contact. He’d just written the letter that morning—no doubt in response to the break-in.

  She stood and walked toward the control room.

  “I have e-mail from Christopher,” she said as she entered.

  Tanner looked up from a screen covered with odd symbols and lines. “What did he say?”

  “I don’t know. I didn’t open it.”

  He nodded, then rolled his chair to another computer where he quickly typed on the screen. Seconds later her e-mail in-box appeared.

  “Do I want to know how you did that?” she asked as she pulled up a seat for herself.

  “I told you I would monitor all incoming and outgoing e-mail,” he said. “The system is rigged to dump a copy in my computer. I haven’t been reading it.”

  “As I said before, you’re welcome to. Nothing very interesting.”

  “Until today.” He scrolled down to the e-mail in question. “Want to guess what he has to say?”

  She shrugged. “He’s got to be furious about the break-in. Do you think he called the police?”

  “Would you if you were him?”

  “That depends on what I’m knee-deep in, and we still don’t know that.” She drew in a deep breath. “Okay—open it.”

  He pressed a couple of keys and the letter appeared.

  Madison. I don’t know what kind of a game you’re playing, but that no longer matters. Your father hasn’t been feeling well for days. I finally convinced him to see his doctor, who s
uspects a heart condition. Blaine is worried about you, which isn’t helping his health. If you won’t come home, at least have the compassion to contact him and put his mind at rest.

  Her stomach knotted and she felt pressure in her chest. “My father,” she breathed.

  Tanner looked at her. “He could be lying. He’s probably lying.”

  “But you don’t know for sure.”

  “True, but I’m willing to take bets on it.”

  “Your father isn’t the one who’s sick.”

  His dark gaze sharpened. “Madison, if something was wrong with your father, the men I have watching him would have told me.”

  Right. “Good point. But are you sure?”

  “Yes. Would you feel better if I asked them?”

  She nodded. “I want to make sure he didn’t go to the doctor or anything. Can they find that out?”

  “They keep a complete log of his activities.” He reached for a cell phone and quickly typed in a text message. “I’ll hear back in less than fifteen minutes.”

  She drew in a breath. “Thanks. I know it’s just Christopher messing with my head, but I need to be sure.”

  “Of course you do. He’s spent your entire relationship making sure you were spooked. Why would this be any different?”

  “Having you on my side helps.”

  “Good.”

  She leaned back in her chair and pointed to the computer screen with the strange symbols. “Is that the encryption program?”

  “It’s the antiencryption. No progress yet. Hilliard didn’t use any of the better-known programs. I’m thinking he had this one custom made. Maybe somewhere in the Far East.”

  “Does that mean you can’t break the code?”

  He smiled. “It means I’ll have more fun breaking it.”

  She looked at the lines of symbols and odd bits of text. “Are you sure?” she asked.

  “Just a matter of time.”

  She admired his confidence and suspected he’d earned it the hard way. Growing up in the barrio meant getting tough or getting dead.

  “I know Christopher is trying to lure me out,” she said. “But knowing that doesn’t make me feel any better about my dad. What if he really tried something to make him sick?”